it's year 2007 and this is the first time i'm blogging

i really don't know what gave me the motivation to actually bother to come and update since no one uses xanga anymore. but a part of me wants to update so here i am :)

it's been awhile hasn't it...over the past few months, i feel myself changing. i've experienced and lived each day and i feel myself going through all the ups and downs in life with a different attitude. sometimes i wonder whether i'm leaving my old self behind and i'm going to put up with a new me. i've looked at people, issues & things in very different perspectives. most importantly, i've looked at some people differently. i've changed my opinions about them for better or for worse. i realize i don't know some of the people that i thought i knew. i also realize there were people i wondered why i haven't met a long time before. at first, it really got to me that the people i thought i knew were changing. but as i take a step backwards, i notice i'm also going through a transitional phase. sometimes, you just can't keep up and fit in all the time. it might not be bad to rest and take a glance at the other world, right?

i no longer care too much of what other people think of me. i used to be a worry wart and pick and nag about little things because i was over sensitive. but now, i simply don't have the mood to bother with what used to annoy the hell out of me. i didn't ask to be who i am, and whoever i am should not be judged or shaped by anyone else.

change is good. change is bad. i really don't know. but there is a change. either you take it, or leave it. :) just be who you are; just be happy.

when all you want to do is forget, the memories come rushing back and reminds you about your past. when you want to look ahead into the future, the road ahead seems to be full of obstacles. present at this moment, do you really have a choice whether you dwell on the past or look straight ahead of you?

i don't deny that i envy those of you that have someone to lean on. sometimes i just can't help but feel like i'm the only person without a special person beside me when i need someone to depend on and we all know that it's not the case. we are really made for pairs aren't we...? sadly..not everyone finds their other half. why does it seem so easy for others to find someone? i don't know...all i know is that i do feel alone...a lot of the times.

what am i even talking about...it's 2:00 in the morning and yeah...i am alone..again.